Contrary to popular belief, not all French women are high-maintenance fashionistas who are obsessed with their looks. Nor are all French men smooth-talking womanizers who will say anything to get you in bed. Understanding these traits and the mindset of French men and women is key to dating as an expat. After all, different cultures around the world have a different appreciation of the qualities that make someone a desirable mate. What might be considered romantic, attractive, or polite in your culture might not be well received in another.
Furthermore, these can differ significantly from other European countries. Whether you are single or not, you should expect to see a lot of amorous behavior being thrown around; regardless of marital status.
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You might say that flirting is an art form in this playful nation; this goes for both sexes, too. French women, for instance, are expected to play to their feminine side and be admired for their beauty and wit.
They might smile in excess, blush, and laugh at your jokes, all the while playing with their hair. Interestingly, many find the game more important than the catch.
This flair for flirting is important to be aware of as an expat, as it can sometimes give the wrong idea.
To avoid any confusion, it is better to just ask them directly. Surprisingly, the French like to keep a cool distance and not appear too eager when it comes to getting to know a potential love interest. This literally translates to the quarter of an hour of politeness. Just make sure you stick around long enough to see them show up, to be sure.
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And when they finally do, they will usually ask for permission first. This is largely due to the fact that in France, kissing on the lips for the first time carries far more weight than in some other countries. In fact, it is seen as a type of unwritten agreement that you are starting an exclusive relationship with someone.
It is therefore not a good idea to kiss someone if you do not want to be in a relationship with them; after all, this can give off the wrong signal and create misunderstanding. In fact, politics is an important topic of conversation in France and is likely to pop up at some point.
Talking about money is generally considered vulgar by French people.
Usually, the man will pay for dinner on the first date, and the woman might pay the next time; but splitting it would simply be seen as tacky. This is good news if you value your independence and want to feel like an equal when dating someone.
Fortunately for women, chivalry is certainly not dead in France. French citizens generally pride themselves on their hospitality and manners. So when it comes to dating, men will usually hold the door open for women, make sure they get home safely, and so on. Aside from good manners, there is another reason for this. In France, women tend to decide if they are dating a person or not, which means that the man is expected to work hard to win her over.
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And because it might take her several dates before she decides whether she wants to have a relationship with date him or not, the groundwork is fairly significant. This perhaps explains why French men have a reputation for being charming and tenacious with women. How a relationship might typically progress in France is really down to the individuals involved - or rather, the woman.
And even when a couple has officially become exclusive and sealed the deal with that all-important first kiss, there are still no rules as to when to get intimate or meet the family. Just like kissing for the first time, sleeping with someone is arguably seen as more meaningful in France.
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The French may be the masters of flirtation, but their true affection is actually more reserved than you might expect. This is because people are more focused on getting to know someone; therefore, sleeping together is seen as expressing a deeper form of affection.
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The good news is that because the French believe in being honest and open when it comes to dating, there is no shame in discussing getting intimate first, too. French people generally like to maintain their independence, so it could be some time before you are introduced to their family and friends.
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It is more down to the fact that men and women prefer to keep their dating lives private; especially in the initial stages of a relationship. However, you can assume that once they do invite you to meet their family and friends, the relationship has become serious.
After all, French families are generally very private and only the most intimate friends tend to join gatherings.
Interestingly, not all cts of dating in France are so traditional.
Since the mids, for instance, the proportion of married couples in the country has been declining. Figures from online portal Statista show that there weremarriages incompared to more thanin This indicated that marriage does not appear to be the preferred mode of union among the French.
Indeed, an increasing number of couples are choosing to not get married or enter a civil partnership but simply live together instead. In fact, research shows that over half a million couplesin France begin living together long-term every year; whereas onlypartners tie the knot, an arrange a civil partnership.
Similarly, the number of unmarried couples living together has increased tenfold since the s; from just 2. This suggests that attitudes are becoming more modern. Interestingly, the number of same-sex marriages in France is also gradually decreasing; from 10, in a year after it was legalized in France to only 6, in More couples are choosing to have civil partnerships instead, and there were 7, signed in alone.
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Despite all of these trends, France still had the second-highest number of marriages in Europe in ; after Germany which had 41, So when compared to neighboring countries, you could say that France remains somewhat traditional in a sense. In French culture, great importance is placed on family. Therefore, as the partner of a French man or woman, you can expect to spend a significant amount of time with your French in-laws.
The relationships between family members remain close, even into adulthood. Relatives tend to live reasonably close to each other and meet weekly for dinners and so on.
When it comes to parenting in Francemen and women tend to take a stricter approach than in some other cultures. They also place a greater emphasis on adhering to attitudes and values that conform to social norms instead of individuality. This remains the norm, despite the significant changes in society; such as the increase in single-parent homes, children born out of marriage, and the rise in working mothers.
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As an expat, this might take some getting used to; especially if you come from a culture that has a more laid-back approach to parenting. Despite the country having one of the highest percentages of women in the workforce, research shows that domestic work and caring for children is still predominantly carried out by women.
And despite the fact that nearly all French women engage in paid labor, many are still expected to fulfill gender-stereotypical roles such as cooking, cleaning, and raising children. Such expectations place a lot of pressure on women. Have a cookie Expatica uses technology such as cookies and scripts to personalize content and ads, provide social media features, and analyze our traffic.
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