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Read more. Countries United States Ohio Oberlin. Prefer something long-term.
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VannaR91 woman 29 y. I have had a second chance at life and I do not have time to waste with games. I work full time.
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I enjoy all kinds of music, except country. VannaR91 woman 29 y. I'm a proud mom. I actually like to have real conversations and get know someone. I'm someone who values depth and intelligence. I like an open mind too. Shaysgram woman 57 y. I love the simple things in life, family and friends. Drinking and the party scene is how many people find possible partners or simply friends that can and often introduce you to a new pool of people and partners.
Posted by: Sandhya on June 4, AM. I think the idea of "dating someone" versus "going on dates" with someone is really different, regarding commitment and trust levels. I have a few friends who go on dates, but it's often a pathway to either a relationship or a more traditional friendship.
My point is that the midground is awkward and scary. It means you have to make up all the rules together, and it's easy to make mistakes that can hurt a lot.
A lot of the disaster-ships I've seen are things were there's intimacy without commitment. I think the difference is the line between devotion and dependence. The former is great, the latter is scary.
In the summer-misery season, I sometimes fear that I skew closer to dependence than I want. Posted by: Aries on June 4, PM. This was a good read. As a person of the "summer community" who's missing someone, it struck a chord. Posted by: Anonymous on June 4, PM. I love it!! You are the best.
Also, totally tickled that the first two pictures were taken on the same day at the same house. Posted by: Erika on June 4, PM. I've grown really used to having a significant other - being without one feels like driving without a map or GPS.
I can move, but without much direction. Posted by: Janani on June 4, PM. Posted by: Ral on June 4, PM. Posted by: Karl on June 4, PM. I was single and inadvertently celibate most of my time in Oberlin, and I always felt like something was terribly, terribly wrong with me. Posted by: Cal on June 4, PM. The problem is that Erika is completely wrong about the location of our picture.
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We are in the backyard of North Pleasant Street, where we used to live, at a kind of gay bbq held by the then-current tenants, and I am admiring the home-brewed beer.
Erika is mistaken, and that is all there is to it. My memory, it is true, is often wrong, missing, or obscured by smoke and haze, but I know what I'm talking about here. Ah, Obie love. Sometimes, that friendship that leads to love only comes after weeks or months of kisses and denial.
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And then, if you're lucky enough to recognize it, it stays. Posted by: Jay on June 5, PM. I can definitely relate to this article, but I only really found it after I left Oberlin. So if anyone reading this didn't come away from college with a permanent life partner, don't fret, there are still lots of other fish in the see.
Posted by: Phil on June 6, PM. I just wanted to say that I really enjoyed your article and how you looked at every different possible side of a relationship or being single. You gave it positives or drawbacks and in the end it wouldn't really mater because it all goes back to the beginning where at Oberlin everyone is family. It's a nice comforting way to look at college relationships since, I am a it's not really something people act about but the inside perspective of someone.
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Thank You! Posted by: April on July 26, AM. Skip to main content Skip to main navigation. Oberlin Blogs. June 3, Instead of dating, we make friends. Even me.
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Adorable Couple Number 1: Erika and Jaye. Adorable Couple Number 2: Liz and Jim. Adorable Couple Number 3: Jeremiah and Haley. Adorable Couple Number 4: You and Me. Responses to this Entry It's true.
You do make terrible puns. Did I make you laugh? Aries, this was both gorgeous and painful.
And true. Anyway, back to the point.
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The point being that I loved this. And, yeah That's amazing. Part of me wishes it wasn't.
Oh, well. Your final picture reminded me of this comic, which has to be shared: [image no longer available] Posted by: Sean on June 3, PM. Aries, this was beautiful.
With dating site man oberlin congratulate, remarkable
Your strength is incredible. What you've said is so true, but I have a different spin on things. Humor me.
I'd totally date you. Drinks when I'm back in town?
Darling, WTF is this business about "not very attractive"? Carolyn I think part of it is that Oberlin doesn't have a huge drinking culture. Dear wonderfully attractive Aries, "Don't you favor the rad bromance over the bad romance?
Re: attractiveness The point isn't that I have dubious levels of self-esteem, it's that looks aren't as meaningful here.
Aries, I heart you so, so much Great post! Oberlin is love. This article was pretty spot-on. Drinking and the party scene is how many people find possible partners or simply friends that can and often introduce you to a new pool of people and partners Posted by: Sandhya on June 4, AM. Kevin I think the idea of "dating someone" versus "going on dates" with someone is really different, regarding commitment and trust levels.
People get attad. People get jealous. People get hurt. Only three months until September, right? Anon I count down the days.
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Erika That was a good house, babe. Some good people always live there. I love you, Aries.